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26.2.07
home.
coming home speeding along i mean really speeding along the motorway the dual carriage ways overtaking being overtaken in this torrential rain.
this total down pour.
the sky turned pink over the tops of dark trees and it fucking pissed down. i read and thought frozen with hands frozen eyes frozen mouth frozen. a group of birds; seagulls wander in and out of existence as they pull across like-coloured pieces of cloud.
home is so dull now. my family the place of comfort they just. they feel so stagnant, no longer comfortable just too worn down to fit anymore. i dont know it's kind of saddening.
and now now i have this full calendar and a schedule and busyness to be being i feel so pressured so stressed. its the first time in my life ive felt markedly stressed. i dont like it. but then if i dont want that, what do i want?
i just wish the tide would ebb. i always seem to end up doing things i dont quite want to do.
i skived off school to finish a painting and its shit. am i hard on myself? i don't know. i just wish things came out like they are in my head. maybe my head is too hard on itself.
i wish i was better at rolling with the punches but i go down like a sack of shit.
whispered by killa b at 12:26 PM |
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