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5.10.04
blagging silver coins
sigh, so i guess i feel kind of blank.
nothing interesting happened today. i got everything done i needed to. nothing that i really wanted to.
nothing interesting though. i feel kind of a dull anticipation of winter. i hate autumn so much. you know that feeling in the air. it is so hard to explain. i just hate it.
i took my first holga film to get developed - it'll take a week. my dad drove me somewhere that processes them, the guy didnt know how to spell my name. i wore my scarf and cream shoes and looked kinda arty. i bought a bra, its black.
i have such a dire lack of inspiration at this precise time. anything creative i do produce seems to be because i have to.
i watched 'eternal sunshine of the spotless mind', we bought that too. it made me realise that although i do experience those feelings every day, and for some time now, it will be a long time till i can do the things i want. but i suppose, even without him, it'd be like that anyway. is that right? it's just, he isnt me, as much as it seems so, and i can't keep him where i want.
i've been asked to do a drama evening at my school tomorrow night.
night x
whispered by killa b at 9:35 PM |
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